Last week, Big Brother reject Emily Parr was in Heat magazine and this week she’s in Nuts. Seems like nudity cures racism.
Last week, Big Brother reject Emily Parr was interviewed in Heat magazine explaining how tough things had become for her following her eviction from the house for making a racist comment; she had received “two death threats”, she was crying all the time, her whole family was a mess, her own mum had called her stupid and she was even nervous about going outside. Emily was, according to Heat, “in a state of complete and utter devastation”.
The logic of the change in strategy seems to be that by moving focus from her moment of shame to a discussion of her bottom, Miss Parr can win over the nation’s ‘lads’ with a cynical flash, and then cash in on all those “deals” while she’s at it.
Heat Magazine – Emily Parr
(Emily allegedly received no payment for this interview)
How are you feeling at this precise moment in time?
[Looks down at her hands.] Hard to say… Feeling lots of negative emotions. I’m pretty devestated.
Are you angry with yourself?
[Nods.] It’s all my fault. I did six months of auditions, working really hard to get where I want to be, and it’s all over in a split second.
Are you surprised by what’s happened?
[Pauses.] No. I broke a rule. I was told about these rules. It’s completely fair that I was taken out, and I understand why it’s happened.
Did you see Celebrity Big Brother?
No, I didn’t. [Pause.] But I was aware of what happened through the media. [A few seconds' silence.] I know people are thinking, “How could she be so stupid after such a media frenzy?” but I guess that makes it even more apparent that it was just a complete mistake. It was an awful, stupid thing to do and I’m really, really sorry. [Spills Ribena on the sofa and tries to clear it up.]
After you said the word to Charley, you said, “It’s not a big deal though, is it?”
I was referring to Charley – I was asking her if she thought it was a big deal. And she said it wasn’t for her.
Did you think she’d find it funny?
No, not funny. But… frankly, it was a term of affection. Me and Charley were good friends in the house. I know it offended people, but it’s a term used rather loosely among my friends – black and white.
Can you understand that most people wouldn’t see it as a term of affection?
Totally. But you’ve got to look at it for what it was. Me and Charley were friends. That’s how it was meant.
But when you left the house Charley said it was a big deal…
I think she was just shocked because of the implications that it had for me. I don’t know. Charley’s a great girl and… We were good friends.
Did you think she was milking it a bit?
I know people have said that, but I don’t think she was. [Pauses.] It’s really easy to be swept up in the emotion inside the house. I think she just got affected by the drama.
Are you ever going to use that word again?
Obviously I’ll be more careful… BUt it doesn’t change how me and my friends act together. Because we feel comfortable with each other. Different words mean different things for people.
Surely after all this, you’re not going to be going round saying it, though?
[Shocked] No, totally not! For me, this whole thing has been a learning curve. I was ignorant not to think about what I was saying. [Finishes her Ribena and fiddles with straw.]
Talk me through what happened, from the moment you were told to leave the Diary Room…
[Looks upset.] I walked through this door – it’s the door that no one ever goes through unless it’s bad news. [Nervous laughter.] Into this corridor. There were three of the executive producers – Phil, Sharon and Becca – who had their arms open and were really sympathetic. They said, “Don’t worry, Emily, you’ll be OK – but do you understand why this has happened?” I said, “I do. I’m so sorry.” [Shudders at the recollection.] Oh, it’s horrible. That walk from the house to Davina’s dressing room was the longest walk of my life.
Describe that walk for us.
[Solemnly] It was about a 50 yard walk into the studio. I remember looking over my shoulder at the big eye on the door I’d gone through a week ago and thinking, “What have I done?”
You just had a nightie on and no underwear, didn’t you?
[Nods.] Becca took off her coat and gave me her shoes. She wouldn’t let go of me. She kept saying, “You’re going to be OK.” I had tears rolling down my face. I was, and still am, in a state of complete and utter devestation. I’m absolutely gutted about it all. [Looks at heat imploring.] I’d do anything not to be in this position. I didn’t mean it.
Then what happened?
We got to Davina’s dressing room and Phil, Sharon and Becca sat round me, gave me a packet of cigarettes and said, “Don’t worry, you’ll be fine.” I was just sobbing.
What time was this?
About 4.30 in the morning. They tried to get me to go to sleep. [Tries to push the straw into the Ribena carton.]
In Davina’s dressing room?
[Nods.] It’s a lovely room. There are pictures of Dermot everywhere. [Laughs.] But I didn’t give a toss about that. I had a million questions running through my head. Then I had the coldest shower of my life.
On purpose?
No, I couldn’t figure out how to work it, so I just sat there with the water running over me.
What did you put on afterwards?
Sharon had a suitcase of her stuff – so she gave me jeans and a hoodie to put on. Everyone was so kind to me, and I didn’t feel like I deserved any of it. I felt like I’d let them all down.
What did they say?
They started talking about the plans they’d had for me. They said, “Emily, we were waiting to bring you out – you were a character, we were putting it off, we had bigs things for you.” It made me feel better – then I was like, “What the fuck have I ruined?”
Did you phone anyone?
I called my best friend, Alex. He’s not my boyfriend by the way – we went out for about a year, but we’re just mates. [Pauses.] But I shouldn’t have expected him to know what to say. [Starts pulling open the Ribena carton.]
What happened?
I said, “Alex, it’s Emily – I’ve done something terrible.” He replied, “Alright! How are you?” I had to say it again before he realised I wasn’t in the house and I was on a mobile phone. I was crying: “I’ve said a terrible word and been ejected from the house.” He was really devastated for me…
How long did you speak to him?
Five minutes. Then I had to call Mum. [Tears the paper off the carton.] The first thing she said was, “You stupid, stupid girl. How could you do that?” She just told me off.
What did you say to her?
Nothing. I just needed to tell her, then I put the phone down.
Were you left alone at any point?
[Shakes head.] No. Sam from the care team had arrived by then, but Sharon and Phil left. I tried to sleep but I couldn’t. My mum called Sam every 20 minutes in various states. “Where does this leave Emily? What clothes does she need? What has my baby done?!” She was a mess. [Yanks the carton, still unable to pull it apart.] My whole family’s a mess. They don’t deserve this – any of them. My sisters are doing ther A-levels. Examiners have been walking them to the cars after their exams. [Makes a frustrated noise] Arggh! They’re much less prepared for stuff like this than me… [Pulls out the straw and uses it to file away the carton.]
Did you sleep at all?
No. At about 7am I got bundled under a duvet cover, into a van and driven to a hotel. My mum and my sister Jessica were there by then. Alice wasn’t because she had an exam that day. Alice didn’t want me to go on the show in the first place. She said, “Emily, how could you? You’ve been so silly.” By this time the TV was on – and I was on the news. It was a really hard day.
What did you do all day?
I paced about. Ordered food that I didn’t eat, and lots of coffee. I’ve not been off the coffee since I’ve been out. I haven’t had any sleep. The whole family is stressed. My mother smoked the other day – I haven’t seen her do that in 20-odd years.
What else happened?
I was taken to the psychiatrist. Then James and Julian from the Big Brother PR company told me what was happening in the papers. They were very matter of fact – but I don’t like things to be sugar-coated. I knew the severity of the situation I was in, but I needed to be in the know. [Still filing away at the Ribena] Oh God. [Seems exasperated that she can't get it open.]
Emily, what are you doing to your Ribena carton?
It’s something to do with my hands.
So were you in your hotel room for the whole day?
For the next 38 hours I didn’t leave the room. Paparazzi were swarming around outside the balcony. As soon as my mum and sister came on to the hotel grounds, they got papped. They were in tears from the shock. Everyone was emotional.
How was your mum?
She kept saying that she wanted to speak out and tell people that I wasn’t a bad person. It was really hard trying to make her understand that I needed to take care of it.
When did you get your clothes?
Later that day. Loads of stuff was missing, but I’ll get it all back. It’s not important.
What was your state of mind?
I broke down in tears constantly – pretty much non-stop for the first two days. First it was shock and devestation, then because I’d let my family down. Can I go to the loo? I’ve drunk so much Ribena. [Disappears for a few minutes.]
You went on BBLB – what was that like?
As soon as the cameras went off me, I burst into tears. Dermot had siad, “Come and meet the audience.” And they were all saying, “Don’t worry.” I just cried and cried.
When did you go back home?
Saturday evening. This week’s been really weird. My dad was housebound for three days because of the media camped on the driveway. He’s suffered the most, I think. His work have been nice, though, and offered counselling.
When you turned on your mobile, did you have many texts?
Yes, loads from my friends. But the most overwhelming thing was my MySpace page – I got over 800 sympathetic and supportive messages.
Did you get any horrible ones?
Two death threats – one siad, “I’m going to hunt you down girl.” But they were posted on the day I left, so they hadn’t had a chance to look at the footage.
Was it strange going back into your bedroom again?
Yeah. [Pauses.] The worst part was unpacking. I put that off for two days. Then my friend Josh came round with this folder of cuttings of me and he just burst into tears when he saw me.
Have you been out yet?
No. I’ve either been in a hotel or my house. I am a bit nervous about going out right now. It’s just about making that step.
Are you worried what people will say?
Yeah. People have nothing to go on – and the tabloids haven’t been especially kind.
We need to talk about some of the things that have been written in the papers. One girl – Gloria Assibey – says you went to college together. Do you know her?
Yes, I do. She was my friend. She’s no longer my friend now, obviously.
She makes some pretty serious claims about you: that you laughed about black people eating rice in a play, that you pushed in front of a black classmate in a queue and said, “Whites first, you bitch”…
[Interrupting] When I read that, one of the first people I called was my tutor Steve – who also taught Gloria for a year – and he said, “I’m so sorry, Emily. Don’t listen to it. If you want me to stand up in court and prove she’s lying, I will.”
What did you think when you read what she said?
At the end of the day I have to laugh. She has a student debt: I guess she needs some money!
Was she lying?
Absolutley! Everything she said was complete bollocks. I can’t stress that enough.
So you didn’t push in front of a classmate and say those things…
She’s got a vivid imagination. I never did that! I’ve just got to rely on the fact that people know most of what’s written in the papers is rubbish.
Do you know Tarnia Ingram?
I can’t remember ever meeting her.
She said you called her “charcoal girl” in the toilet at a club.
Oh my God, no I didn’t! It’s so insulting.
What about Stacey Jones. She said, “Emily hates black people, Pakistani people and Somalians…”
I used to go to college with Stacey. But she’s the kind of girl who claims she’s got whiplash when she’s been drink-driving. [Pauses.] I feel helpless, because I can contol what’s being written. I just hope people know it’s rubbish.
One tabloid said you uncle called your behaviour “disgusting”.
[Looks away.] We haven’t seen him in ten years… Don’t even know where he lives.
How would you describe your feelings now?
There’s still a big cloud hanging over my head… I’m just waiting for some better weather to come along. I want to smile again. I’ll always be gutted by what happened. There’s no amount of words that can cover how sorry I am and how stupid I’ve been. But we’ve all got to move on now, and all I ask for from anyone reading this is that they understand what really happened and they accept my apology.
Nuts Magazine – Emily Parr
(Sources claim Miss Emily Parr’s time cost Nuts magazine £16,000.)
…
Have you been partying non-stop since you got out of the house?
Well, I was out partying until 4am last night and had to get up at 6am this morning, so I need a break from booze. It wasn’t planned, but that’s what happens when you’re 19. I’ll need a day off, but I’ll be back in action in a couple of days!
…
You give yourself ten out of ten for intelligence…
Damn right!
Well, welcome to the Nuts IQ Quiz. Let’s see if you really are as bright as you say. Question one – history: when was the Second World War?
The ’30s to the 40s.
When exactly?
1932 to 1942.
Wrong. It was 1939 to 1945. Question two – English: spell embarrassment.
E-M-B-A-R-R-E-S-M-E-N-T
Wrong! Explain the Big Bang theory in one word.
Bang!
Correct! You only got one out of three, though.
…
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