Monthly Archive for June, 2008

So, Dennis McHugh’s spitting at Mohamed. Hence forth, to be known as Spitgate!

1. The housemates have won this weeks shopping task. Big Brother has rewarded them with cider, lots of cider and they are fully loaded.
2. Rex touches Jen’s painting with Pizza-y fingers. Jen whines “Would you do that to a Monaayyy?” Yes, she actually said that. (Several close-ups of the painting are shown during the following minutes, I personally couldn’t see any difference before or after.)
3. Anyhoo, Jen gets her strop on and storms off to the luxury bedroom where she continues crying, moaning about Rex’s desecration of her art, calling it “evil”.
4. Rex spends several minutes apologising.
5. Jen’s continues wailing, weeping and just generally gnashing her teeth. “[Because the task was over] doesn’t mean you can put your fingermarks all over it. You wouldn’t be able to do that in an art gallery,” she weeps. Er… hahahahahaha!
6. JEN CRY! DALE MAD! DALE SMASH! RAAAAAAAAR! Dale decides he must defend Jen’s… er… honour! He storms off to tell Rex to apologize to Jen. Rex points out he already has.
7. Luke must have been born with a silver spoon in his mouth because he is such a good stirrer. He’s all “he put PIZZA on your picture?”
8. Rex and Mohamed are in the other bedroom. Mohamed tells Rex that Jen is attention-seeking. Really?
9. DALE MAD! RAAAAAAR! STUART GET MAD TOO! STUART SMASH! RAAAAAAR! Stuart decides he has to out do Dale’s outrage at the desecration of Vincent Van Jen’s masterpiece and demands Rex apologizes to Jen.
10. Rex and Mohamed return to the luxury bedroom.
11. Rex tries to apologise again. Jen is ungracious. Dale rejects his apology on Jen’s behalf, and tells him to go away. Dennis begins mumbling “Creep, creep, creep…”
12. Then Team Monet all start shouting.
13. Mohamed says “It’s just painting.”
14. Team Monet all start shouting louder at Mohamed.
15. Rebecca appears to have found a personality. Sadly, it’s a dislikeable one! She jumps up and starts shouting in Mohamed’s face and has to be held back by Stuart.
16. Mohamed seems relatively calm, considering.
17. Dennis decides to join in. “Why don’t you shut the fuck up, nominee. Fuck off, fuck off.” He spits at Mohamed, then continues yelling, “Tramp, fuck off.”  Dennis’ mother must be so proud.
18. Big Brother calls Dennis to the diary room, and asks Mohamed and Rex to go the other bedroom.
19. On his way to the diary room, Dennis continues yelling “Fuck off” at Mohamed. Bloody hell, this is actually quite dramatic!
20. As Mohamed leaves the room. Stuart is yelling “What are you looking at?” whilst Rebecca is bellowing “What’s your problem?” The answer to both questions is probably cidered up halfwits.
21. Mohamed is upset – properly, genuinely, crying upset, not silly fake girly Jen tears. Dennis is waiting outside the diary room camping it up in Mo’s direction.
22. Mario tries to take control of the situation, and he does this through the medium of muttering, “It’s out of order.” Darnell goes into the luxury bedroom to shout at Bex and the others for thinking that spitting in people’s faces is acceptable behaviour. He then tries to fight – um, not sure, maybe Dale or Stuart? Or both? The voice of Big Brother tells Darnell to get himself back to the other bedroom. Dale goes with him, and then they start arguing again, with Dale yelling at Mohamed for “squaring up to a fucking girl”. The voice of Big Brother tells Dale to get back to the luxury bedroom. What a thankless job that must be. Mohamed cries again.
23. Jen is complaining about other people getting involved in her argument with Rex. Aaaaaaaaaaarrrrggggggg! If you hadn’t been bleedin’ whinging about it to all and sundry, perhaps it wouldn’t have happened.

I feel drained. I think I need to go for a lie down. You can watch with your eyes over the fold.
Continue reading ‘Big Brother 9: It’s Just A Painting’